I’ve heard it said that everyday is a new beginning. And, sadly, I’ve been missing out on starting anew.
There has always been so much I’ve hoped to change about myself but have never been able to find the strength/determination to do so…
So maybe the time has come to make a change. Not to just try. To actually DO. To stop making excuses for why I can’t or won’t do something and actually step up and do what needs to be done.
The thing on my mind at this current moment would have to be the way I’ve been living my life physically. To say my weight isn’t perfect would be a complete understatement. In college I gained the Freshman 50 as opposed to the Freshman 15 and it all went downhill from there.
I’ve never in my life considered myself to be a skinny person…but throughout my HS years I maintained a healthy weight through sports and exercise. Years of volleyball conditioning kicked my butt and kept me at a healthy 135 lbs.
However, volleyball became a thing of the past. And, sadly, so did the daily exercise regimes i’d become accustomed to.
HS ended. College began. And the pounds started accumulating.
I slowed down. Became lazy. For 4 years I did nothing extraordinary. I went to class. I did homework. I ate. I went to sleep. And I never realized at the time how unhappy I really was. I secluded myself from people I enjoyed being around and I allowed myself to be content with doing absolutely nothing day in and day out. I was just there.
College ended. And the real world began. Ready or not!
And with it came a new career and the end of a long relationship. New loves. Heartbreak. Depression. And food. Lots and lots of food.
Little by little, I started to notice that I was no longer as small as I had been in HS. 135 lbs had quickly become 175 lbs.
I made excuses for it and just kept thinking “I can take that extra weight off! All I have to do is exercise a little!” But, I didn’t! And it got worse.
Which brings me to where I am at today. I’m in no way happy telling anyone that I now weigh over 200 lbs. I feel terrible. I look terrible. I do not like what I see. I’m honestly disgusted with myself and cannot help feeling that others feel the exact same way. I want NEED a change.
Today will be the day I start over. I start eating better, working out, taking care of myself. And, I’m thinking, maybe if I put it all out there for everyone to see then just maybe it will be extra inititive to make a change.
Going to start a daily log of what I’m getting myself into. What I’m eating and how I’m exercising…and I’m sure there will be a few swear words thrown in there on the days I have Aaron working as my personal trainer.
If you have any ideas, things that have worked for you, foods that you like, exercises that really seemed to make the difference, etc let me know! I can use all the help I can get